Help.

I don't even know how to ask for help anymore. I want to tell someone, "I feel like killing myself" but I can't bring myself burden anyone with that. On top of that, I honestly don't really want to talk to anyone but my best friends, but I can't because they're gone and I don't matter.

I just wish I could die. I'm tired of struggling.

This pain in my chest really hurts and it's like I can't breathe properly. I've been trying to remind myself every single time that it's okay to be alone sometimes and I don't need someone to hold me. But then, I always feel alone. Like I'm always the second option. The person who my friend only need when they need something.

It's funny how I thought I was good at hiding my feelings but then my shrink started asking me what was wrong and why I looked so quiet and tired and that's when I realised that y'all didn't care enough to notice my misery. I think what hurts me the most was that so many people saw it coming and the only thing I ever wanted you to do was to be there for me and comfort me. But you couldn't even do that for me. Do you know how hurtful it really feels?